"Let There Be Theme Parks"

Back on October 23rd of this year, Comet Holmes suddenly, and for an unknown reason, became a million times brighter, and were he still alive today, it's quite possible that Archbishop James Ussher would have been tempted to interpret this phenomenon as some sort of sign from the Divine that he had been vindicated in his claims that the Universe had begun to be created by God on October 23rd, 4004 B.C., according to Ussher's reading of biblical genealogy.

And whilst I have no idea whether modern-day Creationists noted Comet Holmes' increased luminosity, it would appear that their own increased verbosity has resulted in a decision to emulate Ken Ham and others, by constructing a multi-media theme park of their own somewhere in England. As we see from The Observer...

The latest salvo in creationism's increasingly ferocious battle with evolution is about to be fired in Lancashire. Not in a fiery sermon preached from the pulpit, but in the form of a giant Christian theme park that will champion the book of Genesis and make a multi-media case that God created the world in seven days.

The AH Trust, a charity set up last year by a group of businessmen alarmed by the direction in which they see society heading, has identified a number of potential sites in the north west of England to build the £3.5m Christian theme park.

Compared to the $27 million/£14 million cost of Ken Ham's Creation Museum, a UK venture costing a mere £3.5 million would be either a much fitter and leaner economic model than its US rival, or something that lacks the scope and ambition of its counterpart.

The trust claims it already has a number of rich backers who are keen to invest in the project, which will boast two interactive cinemas, a cafeteria, six shops and a television recording studio, allowing it to produce its own Christian-themed films and documentaries.

The 5,000-capacity park will be the first of its kind in Britain, but not in the world. In Orlando, Florida, hundreds of thousands of visitors make pilgrimages to the Holy Land Experience, where they can see a bloodied Jesus forced to carry his cross by snarling Roman soldiers.

Peter Jones, one of the Lancashire theme park's trustees, said the emphasis would be on multimedia rather than the costume re-enactments of famous biblical scenes favoured at Holy Land. 'It will be a halfway house for youngsters,' Jones said. 'Today all they do is binge drink. We will be able to offer them an alternative.'

By producing its own films, the trust believes it will be able to provide an antidote to modern culture. It says on its website: 'On television today there is so much sex and violence, it is no wonder our youth are binge drinking ... This is a revolutionary scheme requiring innovative people with the vision to bring about change and a new direction.'

Binge drinkers are of course a culture unto themselves, and it's difficult to imagine them eschewing their drinks in favour of chewing on the Creationist pap which will apparently be on offer at the theme park - assuming of course that planning permission will ever be granted by those modern-day overlords, whom we know as local councillors.

Whether this theme park will be looking to recruit godless individuals from outside the ranks of the binge-drinking brigade isn't stated - there is no mention here of supposedly uncouth youths who might indulge in recreational drugs and/or pre-marital sex, or heaven forbid, all three activities at the same time - so whether non-binge-drinkers are people deemed to be damned beyond redemption, or in no need of salvation, we shall have to wait and see.

But these thematic Creationists have also set their sights on other targets...

The church in this country is in crisis and many church leaders living in Australia, America and Canada have openly proclaimed that God has left the church in England,' the trust states on its website.

'Evolution has falsely become the foundation of our society and we need the television studio to advocate Genesis across this land in order to remove this falsehood, which presently is destroying the church foundation.'

The theme park's anti-evolution bias and its emphasis on Genesis has raised eyebrows among planning officials, according to Jones, who originally wanted to build the park at the site of an old B&Q store but was refused permission by the council.

'Wigan council slammed the door in our faces. You mention the C [Christian] word, and people don't want to know,' Jones said.

As mentioned elsewhere, the so-called C-word represents quite different things to different people, and the one that might immediately spring to the minds of many, definitely isn't the one being referred to by Peter Jones - and certainly wouldn't be a suitable subject for the general public visiting a theme park - unless of course they were all evil binge-drinkers. (TJ)

AH Trust Theme Park Details

Evolutionary Middleman has this

(via Anthro-L)